We Are Deep In the Heart of Texas

Nomadic seasons of farming adventures with nature thrown in to include; a pinch of family, snippets of friends, counting our blessings, paying IT forward, home school, and the spicy things I decide to rant about.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Kick in the Gut, Still Crying

   As you know, we decided to homeschool our sons.  I have been careful and systematic in adding new subjects to test the abilities of our oldest's knowledge level so, I could build a curriculum around his needs.  Mind you he was in the public school system since the age of four begining with Headstart -- 8 years.  I was told many things about my son; many arm chair psychologists, doctor, educational specialists. List see the laundry list begining at age 4 when he entered their system:


   Now mind you since, grades were a benchmark to show progress in school.  His report cards and progress reports have been A/B mix never a failing grade or a behavior markdown. EVER!

EVER, comments have been WHAT A DELIGHTFUL CHILD, SUCH A RESPECTFUL CHILD, Sensitive Child, SUCH creativity,  etc etc etc.

   Okay let's flash forward to what I know.  At age twelve he was going to be passed into the 6th grade.  He did not know his multiplication tables, cursive, and apparently --- are you ready for this.

   SPELLING, GRAMMAR, PENSMANSHIP, This was a sample of his five sentences after reading 'How to Eat Fried Worms,' a book which is a third grade level -- a fast humorous read so; I could assess his understanding and gauge the other aspects of comprehension after reading.

   I ---- his mother got a serious kick in the gut.  I can barely read to type this; my hands are shaking from anger - disgust - and the realization.  I ALMOST FAILED MY SON AS A PARENT.  I FAILED HIM FOR EIGHT YEARS.  This what my son knew but, could not elaborate all those meltdowns, all those sick days, all those crying jags.

   My son, was being set up for failure by a school system hemmed in by ridiculous laws, policies and guidelines in order, to continue receiving monies on his behalf.

   I hope you can understand what I am trying to say.  I will be back later to edit this but, I just have to get my emotional state under control as well as, finish my own class mid-term.  How in the hell is the UNITED STATES ever going to be a 'super power' again in education?  If this is what is allowed to pass as a 6th graders' work?

Off my egg crate.....

SPECIAL NOTE TO ADD HERE:  I was given 'subterfuge' assignments for his homework. The changes were so subtle; I did not notice how little my son was expected to accomplish.  I trusted a system which was using my son, pushing him through, a paycheck. 

Trust me when I say this..... I am a guilty party in this scenario.  As this world as my witness:



mixednut555 said...

Huggs, my friend. You don't need to cry, hold your head up because YOU figured it out and you are already helping him and he will do FINE! I know this. You have the time, you can start his schooling OVER, teach him what they did NOT.


Sharon said...

Phonics would be the best place to start, I think. I wish I still had my son's workbooks, they really taught him to sound out the words, the word blends, and words that you dropped the e and added "ing" - just an example.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again. You CAN do it! What other choice do you have?


Nekkid Chicken said...

Kat, I do have to start over in some aspects. He can read at the 6th grade level on some topics. I just have to find what he is interested in which is all geared towards hunting, guns, history, and military related subjects. I am just so disappointed in myself.
My love and hugs today, birthday girl.

Sharon, I will start over its all I can do at this time. Thanks for the email; I will not play the victim here as it is my responsibility to ensure my sons are educated. Just a rude awakening. Take care and thanks so much. Mal

Texan said...

Okay, agreed this is a problem. Have yourself a good cry and then pat yourself on the back for doing something about this.

Your son(s) will get a good education that will allow them to live a good adult life.

You know I never had kids but I agree the public school system is a mess. You also know I include the state college level system in that mess!

I tried to post a comment and I guess cyber space ate my first comment, if both show up feel free to delete one :O)...both said the same thing just not worded exactly the same :O)

Little Messy Missy said...

Don't be hard on yourself.

Kids and Canning Jars said...

OK- STOP IT! Enough! Now that you have ranted let us all help you pick yourself up! Remember God sent this child here to this earth. He only expects you to do the very best you can. You are doing it.. You have recognized the problems you are addressing them. Now embrace them and use them to your advantage. You can do this. Like misednut555 said teach him what he does not know. Love him, love yourself and know that you can do it. You have a blogging world to support you. Hugs...Melissa

emajen333 said...

Don't blame yourself, Mal. You should actually congratulate yourself for discovering this now instead of later. You are shocked because you care so much for him and that's a very good thing.


Anonymous said...

I feel your emotion. Cried as I read this and also angered at the school system because it is as you have stated. It is about the money. As long as a child is enrolled in school they get so much money per child.

Great job on the classroom you and your husband are building. Don't be hard on yourself. Your son has already improved as we have witnessed by your post. His self esteem and passion to learn has also grown as a result of progress and not always feeling so frustrated as in the school system. He will be fine. My sister and I came from a very dysfunctional family and we both had learning disabilities as a result of our home enviroment and our mother drinking alcohol while pregnant and once we got out of the negative enviroment of our parents we both started teaching ourselves and turned out okay. I only told you this so that you know he is going to be okay and keep up the good work.

They call me Blue said...

Good for you...I am glad you are giving him a chance by personally getting involved in his education...it's a shame what is happening to our children in public education....and it is happening all over the US...I pray and wish the best for you in your endeavor...Chicken Momma...