I have a friend, Ms. Lilly and she is in her late sixties as well as her husband. Since we moved here in 2006, Mr. Dennis has been ill. The visible changes in his carriage and physical appearance are very noticeable and rapidly change. Ms. Lilly spends the better part of each week driving him to and from medical appointments in San Antonio (VA) and Corpus Christi.
It is so hard to watch a person deteriorate before your eyes however, from my vantage point it's more noticeable than from hers. This man is the love of Ms. Lilly's life and though she knows he is slipping--I can see changes in her. I really don't know if she is afraid he is suffering or more afraid of being alone with no one to take care of.
Another thing I think about is what is he thinking and feeling since he surely must know his time is drawing to a close in this life. I wonder he is too is just wondering when his suffering is going to end and the strain he most know he is putting on his wife from all the care she has to give. So, I sit and think about how I would carry on if I was in the same boat. Would I be a loving and supportive spouse if it was my husband?
All I can hope to do is be available for Ms. Lilly and be willing to listen to her fears and wipe her tears. I can offer her a place to come when she needs a break from her self. Though there are two decades separating our lives, I can see so much of me in her and vice versa. I pray & mediate to find the same grace and humility she walks with everyday.
Love Ya Ms. Lilly,