Just a nude sketch I have done:

Happy Halloween,

Here is a quick doodle I made. I will be posting pictures of my sons' Halloween later. This will be Zephyr's first 'trick or treating' event.

Tomorrow, we will be attending George West's Storyfest. (small town fall festival)

Hope all is well,

My motto: "The Anti Social Personality"

"I am not refusing to answer you,

I am acknowledging your "non-existing"

right to a converation with me;

by ignoring you."

Skunks raided our Guinea Coop

This is a sad day on the farm, our guinea coop was raided last night by skunks. (caught in the act) Four guineas and one banty rooster was carried off. Makes me sad to know they met such a violent death.

Hubby, the boys and I will be reinforcing their house this afternoon. Yesterday, my favorite banty hen was taken, Orange Glo. She was such a great mother and egg sitter. She was also a hen that like to be handled and petted. I do try not to handle my birds much, I would rather they be 'natural.'

Good bye guineas, Sprout & Orange Glo

Thank you bonnielege for being so sweet and understanding for lighting that candle. It's much appreciated.

Hanging wings down here

Little Mans BDAY pix

Wake up Saenz & Happy 4th Zephy

Saenz is always grouchy before school. Soooooo much like his dad, not a morning person. Good morning my Little Man, Zephyr, at 0830 docs in Maryland were inducing me and upping the pictocin trying to urge him out.

Thing is; Little Man wasn't having it so later that evening docs took him by C-Section. OMG he was huge and loud 8 lbs and 15 oz with the wails of a MAD AS HELL, FOGHORN.

I love both my sons!

Happy Birthday

Mommie's Little Man

Daddy's Cuddle Cubby

(more pictures tomorrow)

Texas in the windshield

Don't you absolutely love beautiful mornings?

Our neighbors cow:

My Farm Life & Rug Project

GAY BUG--not a virus

Okay I just love the way kids think and ask questions without filters.

Yesterday, Saenz saw two insects stuck together at the butt. They were insects because each had six legs and they were beetles of some sort and were obviously having insect sex. ROFL

Yes, it seems everything on our farm procreates & all year long.

So he asks me, "MOM, are those gay bugs?"

I told him, "I don't know. " And told him to them over and check for the "Bs"
(boobs or balls).

He said, "Nope that it would be rude to break up their pairing." He did want to know if they were both boys.

Again told him I don't know if they were boys or girls. But, if he felt it was important not to like or see gay things living.

"JUST STOMP THEM."

To which he replied, "NOPE, they are not hurting me."

To which I answered, "Remember that--once you become a man. No need to hate or dislike that which can not harm you. Even if something can harm you, Saenz, you can usually walk away and leave it alone."

So, I can't wait to see what his ten year old mind will come up with next. I am very aware he is coming into his own opinions about sex and body functions. I have noticed him getting jokes on television. This fact means I need to be proactive and ready for his questions because he is hearing things at school and other places. We also have two female cats that go into heat regularly so, their biological changes prompt conversations at least once a month.

Never a dull moment @ Cow & Chicken Town

Do you wonder?

Today, while driving Saenz to school. I thought about a news story I watched on television last night.

The subject dealt with:

A former scientist that was not mentioned in this years' awarding of the Pulitzer Prize in science. Yet, the men who did win stood on his research and discovery. The non-awarded discovered the gene that causes jellyfish to glow. They used his research to develop a technique to HIGHLIGHT the growth of cancer cells within living tissues. The non-awarde is now an out of work, scientist who found a ten dollar an hour job driving a courtesy van at a car dealership.

So here is the thought:

What brush of greatness have you had?

What thoughts rumble in your brain that never get to paper or see fruition?

As a fourth grade child, (LOS ANGELES, California) I got in serious trouble in my science class for suggesting that in the future test tube babies would be possible. Think about that, I was 8-9 in 1974 and I was almost suspended for suggesting such an UNGODLY act.

What future advancements are waiting on the tongue of small children who are blessed not to have constraints on their thinking & just need some one to listen.

Any who, I am just thinking aloud.

Mr. Dennis & my thoughts

I have a friend, Ms. Lilly and she is in her late sixties as well as her husband. Since we moved here in 2006, Mr. Dennis has been ill. The visible changes in his carriage and physical appearance are very noticeable and rapidly change. Ms. Lilly spends the better part of each week driving him to and from medical appointments in San Antonio (VA) and Corpus Christi.

It is so hard to watch a person deteriorate before your eyes however, from my vantage point it's more noticeable than from hers. This man is the love of Ms. Lilly's life and though she knows he is slipping--I can see changes in her. I really don't know if she is afraid he is suffering or more afraid of being alone with no one to take care of.

Another thing I think about is what is he thinking and feeling since he surely must know his time is drawing to a close in this life. I wonder he is too is just wondering when his suffering is going to end and the strain he most know he is putting on his wife from all the care she has to give. So, I sit and think about how I would carry on if I was in the same boat. Would I be a loving and supportive spouse if it was my husband?

All I can hope to do is be available for Ms. Lilly and be willing to listen to her fears and wipe her tears. I can offer her a place to come when she needs a break from her self. Though there are two decades separating our lives, I can see so much of me in her and vice versa. I pray & mediate to find the same grace and humility she walks with everyday.

Love Ya Ms. Lilly,
~:>

Just a thought

Today, I got one of those crazy emails. You know the ones (chain mail); send this to 7 people and fortune will befall you. While, I would have normally just hit the delete button; this time I scrolled to find a wonderful thought that prompted this entry.

'To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.'

When God takes something from your grasp,

He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to

receive something better.

The will of God will never take you where

the Grace of God will not protect you.'

And while I did send the email around after cutting out other's email addy's, I thought about the words. As I do not claim myself to be Christan because I am not by any stretch of the imagination--Christ like.

I do believe in being, doing, and giving the best of myself to others. I try to teach my sons the 'secrets' I have found to ease their paths in this life and the next by being true to their inherent human nature. I want them to be able to feel the connection, awe, and wonder this life has in everything to include death.

I want them to work for their sucesses and failures while trusting their deeds will enable them to reach for greater things than themselves. (I.E. Their own family-one day.) I want them to trust in having a future even when all the NOISE on television and other media rants about GLOOM & DOOM. All this entry boils down to is:

I believe in TRUST and I will walk in my own version of faith to honor a higher power----Our Creator.

Teaching Personal Repsonsibility

This is a sticky wicket with me. Friday, Saenz's teacher called me to inform of his lack of homework assignments. This shocked me to the core because he is not allowed to go anywhere in the house right after school until his homework is completed. As we work on it, I cook dinner & help Zephyr color.

The end of the six weeks was this passed week, and he has been dinged with three homework missing points. Basically this means he is not allowed to participate in Fabulous Friday. (Pizza Party, untucking of shirts and extra recess.) And here is where the problem lays:

He was all in tears about 'forgetting' his homework assignments and had the gall to ask me to help him out. Promising to turn in all his assignments if I call his teacher to get him allowed to participate.

THIS REALLY PIZZED ME OFF

1. What about the other children who met the standard?
2. Even hubby was pressuring me to HELP him out.
3. Do parents really expect their children to learn by shouldering all the weight of their child's mistakes and learning experiences?
4. I helped my child each night with his homework, ensured his homework was in his folders placed in his backpack, and taken to school everyday.
5. Does Saenz think BARGAINING with me will make me forget his responsibility to himself, his classmates and teacher?

SO::::::::::::::::

I told him "No way on this planet would I; pick him up early or get him to Fabulous Friday."

It is my responsibility to allow my child to feel the PRICK & Pain of his own lack of personal responsibility. Mind you, I am all for helping my child just not for shouldering his responsibility. Perhaps, this one disappointment will enable him to see how his INACTION'S carry weight and consequence?

WHO KNOWS but, this is my thought for the day.

Helping my son over come IRLEN

Just this year my eldest son, Saenz has been diagnosed with IRLEN or a variant on dyslexia. We already know he has ADD but a mild form. (MY theory is his behavior is linked to his inability to see as others do & thus he acts out.)

GO HERE FOR INFORMATION & DEMONSTRATION of how he sees.

http://www.irlen.com/

Since white paper and fluorescent lighting seems to be an issue for him. We are switching back to regular light bulbs in his room and the kitchen table (homework) station. This hopefully will help cut down some of his headaches until a certified physician comes back down to Cow & Chicken Town to test his 'color variation & astigmatism' and prescribe his layered colored glasses.

What is interesting is; his special education teacher wants to test me to see if his diagnosis has a heredity link. Either way, all I know is I have no depth perception, am clumsy and hate bright lighting.

Never knew my penchant for very dark curtains may be a link to a visual encoding & decoding problem in my own brain.

I will write more as we know more...............

Stay tuned, and I will let you know about regular vs. fluorescent light bulbs.

In the car; weird revelation

I was thinking today about how my husband and I decided the names for our sons. It's weird but in both cases, we were out driving & accomplishing errands.

Saenz Knight was picked on San Antonio's highway 90 and Zephyr Ayrt was decided coming back from the Betheseda in Maryland. Way weird to realize driving & highways have given us private time to talk about something significant like naming our children. I suppose it is a sign that Americans spend lots of time driving.

Either way, Saenz is named after each of his grandfathers' surnames. Zephyr is from Zephyrus (I love my tour in Crete, Greece.) and Aryt is from Tyra (She died while pregnant with him.) I hate to take credit for these names but like the uniqueness and them not being another common name. Their names have meanings and link them to their pasts.

Anyway that is my LIGHT BULB moment of the day. ~:>

You May Not Know

This is a poem dedicated to all my brothers and sisters in arms in these uncertain times. I wrote this while remembering my own smallness and fear while on detail to a flight line:

You May Not Know

The sound of the ramp hitting ground
Vibrations of boots plunking sound
You are here to liberate
Just leaving family, last week-late

You May Not Know

The sound of a heart in its chest
Pushing blood at its best
Saluting a woodened box draped in shroud
That could be you-thinking not--aloud

You May Not Know

Nekkid Chicken
November 13, 2007

CUMP-NEY taught me to lurk.

I am a long time people observer, and this comes from my grandparents adage; "child should be seen and not heard." As children, we were expected to play outside all day and then come in for meals only to return to the outdoors after eating. Now, this changed if we has CUMP-NEY.

Then we had our faces, hands and yes--bare feet were washed along with hair tidied. When CUMP-NEY showed up, we sat quietly on the cross-legged on the floor out of traffic; while adults talked. It was hard to stay quiet and usually if the conversation turned 'private' we were soon ushered outside on the front porch. Mind you, the screen door did not silence the conversation.

CUMP-NEY taught me: racism, out of wedlock babies, marital affairs, stealing, lying, cheating, illnesses, bodily functions, finance, gossiping and just plain old human weaknesses.

Fast forward to my military career and we still had this version of CUMP-NEY. When folks got into trouble, they lost their status (security clearance) and someone had to escort them within secured areas to process paperwork. This is how several times I have been that child again sitting quietly on the floor while another's career hung in the balance over making poor choices. Again here we will leap forward into a public arena:

I have watched people all my life and will continue to do so. The one thing I will do is; not sugar coat what I see and feel when people want to be coddled for not accepting personal responsibility. I will not PUT ON AIRS for CUMP-NEY because to with hold honest opinion is the same as LYING in my opinion. And yes, I realize some folks have the gift of tact. I however, DO NOT. So to ask me to change my personnae to placate another in the name of false empathy is dishonest.

So here I will go back to lurking..................

Simply family in touch with life

Each day, I awake to either stare off into the ceiling until my brain is ready to move. Or, I get out of bed to dress and get Saenz ready for school along with little man. Mind you; I wait until the sun has peeked in or we will chance running into a skunk, coyote, or oppossum on the way to our farm truck. Then armed with thermos or juice box we make our way to George West in relative silence for the 13 miles through back country "farm to market" roads.

My sons are fortunate because they can witness nature on our small five acres with our animals or play the wild animal tally each time we take a trip. This fine morning it was only 62 degrees outside and still kinda dark and we counting 5 rather large field rats, 3 Mexican eagles eating roadkill, countless cows of different breeds, butterflies and one very lost wild pig that ran out in front of us. Each day brings us new tallies and adventures in the 45 minute round trip. I think about how different their life would be in San Antonio with busing to school and traffic jams on the way home.

Each day I count my blessing for the sweetness of our country home, almost none existent crime, clean air (minus cow piles and chicken pooh), and realize we are simply family in touch with life around us.

~:>